Belief

In my quest for knowledge I am constantly jumping down rabbit holes. That said, I have been having an issue with the fact that everywhere I turn these days I am faced with religion. And not just pleasant reminders that their are plenty of options out there, but instead obnoxious people who are so self riotous it hurts.

I am not against religion. I choose not to partake in any organized religion but I can appreciate the benefits it offers in some peoples lives. I was raised by non religious parents and my grandmother whom I loved above all else took me to weekly Sunday school and life was good. The older I got the more clearly I was able to see the flaws in the "system." I made a personal decision that I needed more information before I was willing to accept any religion, including the one I was surrounded by.

I cannot say I fully understand all religion. I have spent time studying the histories of many of the most prevalent religions and still I have chosen none. I am okay with this, this is my choice.

Most people in my world accept this as my choice and do not try to sway me.

In the past I have been very supportive of other peoples choices of religious practices. I see myself as a tolerant and easy going person on this issue. However lately a small group of ladies and their views are getting to me. I am finding myself irritated by them. They sit and profess their love to their god and judge each other by what they think their god would want. They preach tolerance and the cast out non conformists. They blame things on their god that are really their own uneducated insecurities. This behavior is nothing new, I know. What is new is my intolerance. Where is this coming from...


My therapist and I are working on regression therapy. The hope is the I will stop feeling guilty for not allowing my mother into my life for over 14 months now. I am doing better at accepting her narcissism as a fact and also no longer making excuses for her choices. This is good for me. The more I learn the easier it is to let her go. Where is this all going?


I kept seeing in blogs people claiming to be Objectivists. This was a new term for me so it intrigued me. I finally found a blog with a post "Why I am an Objectivist."


What I learned from this post was more than just a definition of "Objectivism" but also a definition of "Altruism."

"It is important to note that altruism is the antithesis to selfishness. Altruism
is the “unselfish concern for the welfare of others” and is in disastrous,
direct conflict with rational self-interest. This is not a definition of
convenience, but the actual meaning of altruism. I reject altruism in every
form.When someone is repeated told that he must put the welfare of others before
himself, he begins to develop a sense that his worth is somehow linked with his
concern for others, extending as far as those unknown to them, and
unidentifiable by the values they hold – as if each human being is responsible
for the life of every other human being regardless of that other’s choices,
values, or morality. This moral code dictates that one reject cause and effect
and assume that every human being, by virtue of being a human being is worthy of
his efforts in the form of his time, money, and consideration before he, or his
loved-ones are worthy of his efforts." Posted by LB on blog 3 Ring Binder

This was very revealing to me. Is it possible that being raised by a narcissistic drug addict taught me to be altruistic. Have I been subscribing to a "religion" or belief system my whole life without realizing it on a conscious level. And as I go through my therapy and accept my mother for who she is am I then coming closer to a new belief system. And is it in this new belief system that these ladies with their religious outpourings are becoming less tolerated by myself. In my new “rational self-interest” am I just allowing myself to feel that which has not been allowed before.
I welcome any feedback and I welcome you to take a look at the blog I linked above. I have only recently found LB but I am forever enlightened by it already. I also want to thank LB for taking the time to write the extensive post on Objectivism. It is an intriguing concept for me and I hope I have not misconstrued it above.